The social and sometimes physical battles between GOAT wives and their husbands’ mistresses, popularly known as side chicks, are not just about to end anytime soon. This is a long-standing tussle that has been there and is getting bigger and bolder as the years go by.

People no longer hide the fact that a married man is a no-go zone no more; better still, married men have made it clear that they’re not zipping up and faithfulness was never meant for men!

We see wives - let’s call them main chicks in this context - literally fighting for their marriages by going for their husbands’ mipangos’ throats. Some leave. But most of them stay and spend their time being motivational speakers calling the other women (because chances are, a philanderer won’t keep just one woman on the side) homewreckers, husband snatchers, and all those nasty names that are not nasty anymore!

The question is; is it worth it? We all know how they (wives) hide in the phrase ‘a man will never leave his wife for a side chick’. This phrase has cemented shaky marriages and given a good number of women hopes of a happily ever after. Despite the recurrent irritating infections, emotional breakdowns, and sometimes physical abuse, this phrase is the lie that binds them - till death do them part!

It’s 2024 and the presence or absence of the wife no longer scares another woman, a side chick. It’s her (wife’s) presence that the side chick wants. Now, before y’all beautiful GOAT wives cry oceans and give unsolicited advice to women who date or chew your philandering husbands, hebu we check on a few unpalatable and uncomfortable truths about side chicks.

They don’t want you to leave. Where are you going, Magdalena? A side chick is a side chick and she has no intention of displacing or taking the position of the wife. She has no plans further. She might be keeping him here for social status, for fun, or mostly for the bucks! A kid or two might pop up during the escapades, but this doesn’t mean she’s getting married to your husband.

Stay put, kamum.

Your husbands love the mistresses. Because if they don’t, then why the hell can’t they stick with their wives? Him having another woman out there doesn’t mean that he doesn’t love you either. Bro loves both of you, differently.

You have what she doesn’t have, and vice versa. Even if he has six of them - he knows why, he isn’t stupid.
Not leaving you for the other woman (women) is not a sign that he loves them less. The bottom line is, you’re all loved.

Some of those outside women have kept your marriage. The glue that binds. You know what I mean, no? They’re the reason you’re still married. They’re the peace that he needs because they keep the ecosystem of you and your husband balanced. She keeps him on checks and balances. Some are so tough that they swallow painkillers for your headache - fight off other women for y’all. You gerrit?
They’re good financial advisers.

Buana, there are mipangos out there who take loans to help out the first family when things are stuck. They pay off small family debts and even choose nice handbags and dresses for you. You want your man to leave a woman who buys him nice shirts and leather belts? Philegona, kneel and pray that she never lacks. Because if she does, you might.

By a stroke of bad luck, some of those women you call whores end up having just the same rights and are treated as special as you. Some are even much better. Their kids attend good schools, they drive nice cars, and go for vacations just like you.

She will never take your place, she doesn’t even want to. She just guards her place and stays in her lane. She’s content with being number 2, 3, or 7. Relax, you’re the GOAT.

If you decide to fight your husband’s other women out there telling them to leave your man alone, mummy, you’ll fight till Kingdom comes because it’s him who doesn’t want to be left alone.

Two things - one, accept the fact that he’ll always have them out there and stay, or two, pack your bags and leave. Because chances are, he might not leave her (them). Or he’ll drop and pick.